it's that never ending cycle back again baby
Friday, Oct. 10, 2003 - 1:27am
ah, one of those days, one of those days.
i dunno, i'm just tired of this all. i'm tired of having to do stuff for school, i'm tired of trying to pretend like i get along with people, i'm tired of just caring about things. and that scares me... b/c i've never thought that before.
i mean, it's not like i don't care about things. i do, i care a lot about so many things. it's just, some of the things i used to care so much about, are just down the drain, and if this were last year i would be trying so hard for it to be right, but now i'm just like whatever.
and i don't even know what's wrong. today when i got home from school i was in such a terrible mood. i just sat around and i can't even say that i was thinking, b/c i wasn't really. i was just there. and i just couldn't make myself get up and do anything (which explains why i'm up at 1:30) and i couldn't make myself happy. and then when i finally did start thinking everything i thought about just made me sad.
i don't know, i probably shouldn't even be posting this or even typing it. b/c someone might freak out, and that's not what this is. this is just be changing, and me not being able to adjust to it, b/c i'm always like that.
and plus, i don't think the total lack of sleep due to my insane procrastination, and the crotch shit, and the weather, and the pms help the situation in my mind out at all.
